Sucking Up to Santa – Xmas List 2008

nice22

 

Dearest darlingest Santiest Santa,

There is a rumour going around that you know all about me.  If this is truly the case, then you already know what a very extremely wondrously wonderfully perfectly good girl I have been this year.  I am rocking that Nice List this year.

There is another rumour going around that you reward such splendiferously tremendously beautilicious behaviour with prezzies.

Knowing that your saintly self must be exceptionally marvelistically reasonable, I would like to present the argument that since I have not bothered your Most Superdelic Magnificence for many, many years, you have some catching up to do. 

Thus I submit my wish list for this holiday season. 

*I am also a reasonable person, Santy, and I realize that at this late date, certain items may be out of stock, so I will accept suitable substitutions if necessary. 

My Wish List by Drea M.

  • a helicopter; should this prove impossible, I will settle for:
  • the IP addresses and password hacks for the Air Miles servers.
  • if you could please pull some of your elves from their duties of making toys, bugging houses and tapping phones (I know this must be how you know about all the naughtiness that goes on) and re-delegate them to doing housework and scooping cat litter, I would really like that.
  • a helper monkey; I’m not disabled, I just would really, really like one.
  • a publishing contract with Time/Warner books and/or a magic genie lamp.
  • Dom Pérignon.  The company.  (Don’t tell me you can’t do this.  You can make reindeer fly.  However, I would settle for a lifetime supply of champagne delivered to my door.)
  • I guess while I’m at it, I should work the Nice card a bit more to be on the safe side and ask for, you know, like, world peace and ozone and an end to poverty and hunger and all that.  If you have time after the helicopter and monkey.

Your attention in this matter is greatly appreciated, Santa.  And I wouldn’t want to pressure you or anything, but please bear in mind that should  you find it impossible to meet my demands, 2009 may find me exploring my Naughty List options.  Not a threat or anything, just FYI.

Love and kisses to Mrs. Claus and the gang,

Drea M.  xoxo  ❤

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5 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I want a Helper Monkey!
    Me too! Me Too!

  2. Hey Drea,
    Great stuff! Well-written, entertaining (hard to find, strangely enough, in a saturated blogosphere).

    Best,
    ~a
    http://www.curiouserx2.wordpress.com

  3. How do I stumble onto sites that have wish list for helper monkeys? I just added helper monkey to my list. Hope its not too late.

  4. It’s never too late to ask for a helper monkey.

  5. No helper monkey this year. Looks like my unhelpful hound is going to get another free pass this year.


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