A Tracker is a helluva tiny vehicle. Yes, it has four-wheel drive. Yes, it is technically classified as an SUV. But it is a tiny vehicle. It actually has less storage capacity than my two previous cars – a VW Golf and a Toyota Tercel, both very compact cars in their own right. But the Tracker is smaller. Which is great when you’re talking mileage, but not so great when you want to talk capacity. The tailgate space in Skipper (my Tracker’s proper name) is only about the depth of a case of beer (which most would agree, is wide enough…)
Like so many things in life, though (cough* me*), Skipper, though tiny, is awfully cute. Cuteness is very important.
I am now going to wow you with something that kind of wowed me today.
I have a tendency to live out of my car in the summertime, so I decided to clean Skipper out in anticipation of a trip to the city next week since I’ll be doing a fair amount of visiting and will require seating space that is currently not exactly available.
The following is an inventory of all the crap I managed to squeeze into this retardedly tiny jeep.
- 1 black mountain bike named Spike (I don’t have a bike rack for the back of the vehicle yet, so this is stowed on top of the folded-down rear seat…and partly over the folded-down front passenger seat…and yes, it was quite a feat to come up with this arrangement.)
- 1 large purple boogie board with leash
- 1 grey flowered helmet (for skydiving and biking)
- 1 pr navy flippers
- 1 pr child-size (shut up) skydiving goggles
- 1 large floppy straw hat with decaying flowers (gifts from children) tucked into the brim
- 1 light-weight backpacking tent (Go ahead and laugh if you must, but if you know anything about me, you know I’m pretty…spontaneous sometimes.)
- 2 camping mess kits
- 1 Epipen prescription, never filled because I am a rebel and those stinkin’ bees don’t scare me
- 1 notebook
- 1 pen
- 1 ‘do rag
- nylon rope
- 1 pr surfing shoes
- 22 seashells (assorted)
- 4 pretty rocks
- 1 piece of brain coral
- approximately 2 cups of sand shaken from floor mats
- 4 pieces of sharp glass picked up off the beach so no one steps on them
- 1 vertebrae from unknown animal (taken from beach because it’s cool)
- 1 bag containing gifts for people I keep meaning to visit
- 3 library books (not quite overdue – yay me!)
- 1 bag of cat treats (for vet visits)
- 1 scrap of badly tea-stained post-it note with barely-legible directions to a friend’s house
- 1 dayplanner (rarely used)
- 1 black art portfolio
- 1 small portable watercolour set
- 1 skydiving jump log
- 1 Canadian Sport Parachuting Association rulebook
- 1 Canadian Sport Parachuting Association skills manual
- 1 pr running shoes
- 1 pr cycling shoes
- 1 pr cute shoes (one of which is missing its heel – left behind in a driveway in Lawrencetown on a recent visit *see previous entry for tea-stained post-it*)
- 1 pr navy yoga pants
- 1 red long-sleeved t-shirt
- 1 beige shawl
- 1 red knitted over-sized hooded cardigan
- 1 black Indian cotton peasant blouse
- 1 brown Mexican blanket
- 1 bottle Off bug spray
- 2 flashlights with spare batteries
- 8 granola bars (assorted)
- 4 L bottled water
- 1 portable air compressor
- 1 car jack
- 1 tire iron
- 1 windshield brush/scraper
- 1 spare fan belt
- 6 assorted maps/road atlases
- 1 portable dictation recorder
- 1 Swiss Army knife
- 14 cassette tapes (yes, cassette tapes. Skipper is not a modern vehicle.)
- 1 MP3 player with external speakers (I, on the other hand, am a modern girl)
- 5 cloth grocery bags
- 1 jug windshield wiper fluid
- 4 pairs sunglasses
- 1 portable aluminum coffee mug
- 1 stick of antiperspirant
- 1 tube of lipgloss (sunblock)
- 1 tube of lipgloss (pretty)
- 1 small travel hairbrush
- 1 tire pressure gauge
- 1 Crescent wrench
- 1 waterproof disposable camera
- 6 bungee cords
- 2 tubes sunscreen
- 1 roll of toilet paper (you never know)
- 1 lighter
- 1 can WD40 (good for lubricating stupid ragtop window zippers as well as bike chains)
- 1 nylon folder containing important car documents
- 1 pr fingerless cycling gloves
- 1 pr striped winter gloves
- 1 winter scarf to match striped gloves
- 1 pkg sparklers
I’m not even kidding.
Do you think there’s a Guinness Book record related to this? Or a support group?
LMAO, that’s awesome. I had a Tracker in HS (We called it the Cheap Jeep) and i can’t IMAGINE fitting all that stuff in it. I miss my car 😦
‘Cheap Jeep’ – I may have to steal that.